The Text
And a woman who held a babe against her bosom said, "Speak to us of Children." And he said: Your children are not your children. They are the sons and daughters of Life's longing for itself. They come through you but not from you, And though they are with you, yet they belong not to you.
You may give them your love but not your thoughts, For they have their own thoughts. You may house their bodies but not their souls, For their souls dwell in the house of tomorrow, which you cannot visit, not even in your dreams. You may strive to be like them, but seek not to make them like you. For life goes not backward nor tarries with yesterday.
You are the bows from which your children as living arrows are sent forth. The archer sees the mark upon the path of the infinite, and He bends you with His might that His arrows may go swift and far. Let your bending in the archer's hand be for gladness; For even as He loves the arrow that flies, so He loves also the bow that is stable.
Glossary
| Word / Phrase | Meaning |
|---|---|
| babe | a baby |
| bosom | chest |
| Life's longing for itself | life's own desire to continue and renew itself |
| house (verb) | shelter, protect |
| dwell | live |
| strive | try hard |
| seek not | do not try |
| tarry | linger, stay at one place |
| sent forth | sent out, sent forward |
| archer | one who uses a bow and arrow; here, God |
| the mark | the target |
| the path of the infinite | the endless road of life and time |
| might | power, strength |
| stable | steady, firm |
Line-by-Line Explanation, Part 1: Children Belong to Life
"Your children are not your children." A startling paradox. Parents give birth to children, yet the Prophet says they are not theirs. He means that children are not possessions to be owned.
"They are the sons and daughters of Life's longing for itself." Children are born of life's desire to go on. Life is personified as longing for itself. Children belong to this larger life, not to any one family.
"They come through you but not from you, / And though they are with you, yet they belong not to you." Parents are the channel through which children come into the world, not their source or owner. Children live with their parents but do not belong to them.
Line-by-Line Explanation, Part 2: Love, Not Control
"You may give them your love but not your thoughts, / For they have their own thoughts." Parents should give love freely, but must not force their own ideas and opinions on children, who can think for themselves.
"You may house their bodies but not their souls, / For their souls dwell in the house of tomorrow…" Parents can give children food, shelter and care, but cannot control their inner selves. Children's souls live in the future ("the house of tomorrow"), which parents cannot enter, "not even in your dreams". Each generation has its own vision of life.
"You may strive to be like them, but seek not to make them like you. / For life goes not backward nor tarries with yesterday." Parents may learn from children's freshness and openness, but should not try to make them copies of themselves. Life always moves forward; it does not go back or linger in the past. Moulding children in the parents' image would drag life backward.
Line-by-Line Explanation, Part 3: The Bow and the Arrows
"You are the bows from which your children as living arrows are sent forth." An extended metaphor. Parents are the bows; children are living arrows. A bow does not travel with the arrow; its job is to send it forward.
"The archer sees the mark upon the path of the infinite, and He bends you with His might that His arrows may go swift and far." God is the archer. He alone sees the target (the purpose of each child's life) on the endless path of the future. He bends the bow - the parents - with His strength, so that the arrows fly swift and far. The "bending" suggests the effort, patience and sacrifice of parenting.
"Let your bending in the archer's hand be for gladness; / For even as He loves the arrow that flies, so He loves also the bow that is stable." Parents should accept this bending gladly, not with resentment. God loves the flying arrow (the child who moves ahead) just as much as the stable bow (the parent who stays steady and supports). Both roles are precious.
The contrast: "the arrow that flies" and "the bow that is stable". The arrow is moving, free and going far - the child's journey into the future. The bow is steady, firm and stays behind - the parent's role of stable support. One cannot work without the other.
Poetic Devices and Features
| Device | Example | Effect |
|---|---|---|
| Paradox | Your children are not your children | Shocks the reader into rethinking ownership |
| Personification | Life's longing for itself | Life is shown as having desires |
| Metaphor | the house of tomorrow | The future as a place parents cannot enter |
| Extended metaphor | bows, living arrows, the archer | Parents, children and God |
| Parallelism / repetition | You may give… but not…; You may house… but not… | Balances what parents can and cannot do |
| Antithesis / contrast | the arrow that flies / the bow that is stable | Movement against steadiness |
Form. The poem is in free verse - a prose poem with no regular rhyme or metre, spoken as a sermon or wise saying.
Tone. Calm, wise and advisory, with a spiritual note.